The Gravelpit Testing Initiative
by PixelsShattered
Summary: ATLAS and P-Body are sold to RED and BLU to participate as the tenth class in a never ending war! Acting as the 'Portaleirs', each must fight for the worthless gravel pits beneath them. Rated T for battle. Review!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hullo everybody, I'm back! I had this awesome idea (more of a test) that I haven't seen anybody else do, so why not throw ATLAS and P-Body into the madcap world of Tuefort?! Great idea, right? They respawn like the mercs, and they are orange (close enough) and blue. Onto the story!**

_"Veeeeeeery good. You two are really starting to become a strong team."_ GLaDOS addressed the android testers, voice dripping with sarcasm. The two bots in question, however, didn't seem to care and high-fived at the completion of another test chamber before allowing the reassembly machined take them to the next chamber. However, the pair was not reassembled in another test chamber, but in a large, non-portal-friendly room.

_"Orange, Blue, I have received a letter regarding your new, well, jobs. To me, it sounds like torture beyond belief,"_ GLaDOS paused and observed the uneasiness in their eyes. _"Remember what I told you about war? That is where you are going." _GLaDOS chuckled as both ATLAS and P-Body's glowing eyes shrank in fear and the two bots began to shake. _"I almost declined, but I have 4999 other teams to test on. You two were in last anyway. Orange, in particular, was the lowest of the 10000 testing robots."_ Blue did a small fist pump, still shaking._ "Goodbye"_ was they last the cooperative bots heard before they promptly exploded.

_-At the BLU Base, Tuefort-_

The nine mercenaries were seated at a long table, feasting on a meal of barbecue ribs and mashed potatoes after securing a victory over RED. At the table, a large muscular man, referred to by his fellow men-in-arms as 'Heavy' was conversing in a Russian accent and broken English with the man seated across from him, who replied in a heavy German accent. This man was the team's field medic, simply called 'Medic', who had played a major role in the capture of the intelligence during the day's battle. Next to him sat a slightly thinner and taller Australian man, the Sniper, arguing with the mercenary seated across from him, who spoke in a French accent and seemed to have a slight bit more formality than his colleagues, who was known as the Spy. Down the table, a figure dressed in a blue, fireproof, full body suit, a flame insignia on one shoulder. The person had a gasmask that was pulled up ever so slightly to allow eating, but other than that, no skin showed. The person, called the Pyro, listened intently to a story the team's Engineer was telling about the fight with the opposing team's Spy over a sentry. Next to the Engineer sat the Scout. Scout was the youngest of the nine fighters, but also the fastest, and the least well behaved. In a verbal throw-down with Scout was the Soldier, the most patriotic American (in his opinion) who ever lived. The soldier had a round blue helmet that covered his eyes and a blue jacket to match with grenades strapped across it. Next to soldier was the demolition expert, known as the Demoman, who was currently passed out, the Scotsman's face plastered with mashed potatoes, unfinished bottle of alcohol in hand.

The next day, instead of the Administrator announcing the beginning of the day's battle, she announced that the day was to be a cease fire to allow each team to welcome its new class.

"Heavy think team have enough babies" Heavy concluded, nudging Scout, who retorted rather colorfully in his rough Boston accent. "Besides, team have engineer, spy, sniper, scout, demoman, medic, pyro, and soldier. There is no room for new man."

A few hours later, the new member of BLU arrived, or rather, two large boxes arrived addressed to Engie. Upon inspection, the engineer was ecstatic to find that the boxes were machine parts from Aperture Science, sent from Michigan. The parts were for an assembly machine, although Engineer was unsure what use a reassemble machine would serve to a team of human killers. None the less, Engie constructed the machine in the Respawn room as instructed, and called the other eight BLU mercenaries to watch as it was activated. The machine whirred to life as the base's power was connected into it, and arms flew out from each side and began quickly building the spherical robot ATLAS.

The mercenaries stepped back as the blue android stepped hesitantly out of the reassemble machine and observed the nine men surrounding it. ATLAS let out a few low chirps in hesitant greeting, gripping his handheld portal device uncomfortably. Amazingly, the Pyro responded with a muffled 'Mhuph Murphh Mhurph' which sailed through the language processor as 'Hello ball guy'. ATLAS cautiously waved at the group stood, unmoving.

Finally, it was Sniper who spoke up. "Oi, ya ain't one of Grey's bots, are ya? I'll slice ya to bits if y'are!" which made poor ATLAS even more confused.

Engineer came to the bot's defense. "Hey there, Sniper, that ain't no way to treat your new teammate. Don't want another class after ya, do you?" Engie said as he gestured to Spy, who was still bitter after Sniper showered him in Jarate on a bet from Scout. ATLAS unintelligibly chirped in agreement. "Now what is your role on this here team?" Engineer inquired. The android thought for a second, before glancing down at his portal gun, stepping back and firing a blue ring in the ceiling with a second, purple ring under Scout. Scout of course, was not expecting the floor to disappear beneath him and fell through the portal onto the floor ten feet below. "Impressive…" Engie complemented as the rest of the team, sans Scout, burst into applause and laughter.

A quick Medigun blast later and Scout was back on his feet, although still a tad bit annoyed at the new class, dubbed the 'Portaleir' by Demoman. With that, ATLAS felt suddenly welcome by the strange band of men, and laughed internally that had been so afraid of this new prospect. Maybe war wasn't as bad as GLaDOS had said. Only time would tell.

**A/N: Whaddya think? Should I do a second chapter or leave this as a one-shot? (That means vote for what's next, if anything) Anyway, two works in one day?! Strange Lands got an actual update so check that out too.**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Second chapter! Honestly, this story is SUUUPER fun to write, so don't be surprised if I update it more than the others. However, STRANGE LANDS IS ON AN INDEFINITE HIATUS, PM ME IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO TAKE OVER! Also, I just got TF2 the other day (You should too; it's free!), so now I'll be able to describe the maps a bit better.**

-Tuefort, Blue Base-

"Can I even Ubercharge ze robot?" Medic brought up the next day as the team prepared for the last round before moving to the Foundry for a week.

"That's a good point, Doc, which is why I came up with a Solution to yer problem." Engineer replied. "I've made an Ubercharge substitute for ol' ATLAS over here. May I present to y'all the Uber-battery, which replaces the standard battery pack, and I have already installed. So yes, Doc, you can Ubercharge or Kritzelkreg 'ze robot'." Medic gave the team's resident genius an unamused look, before going back over by Heavy to ready an Ubercharge.

ATLAS wasn't feeling as confident as he felt the previous day. After letting the matter sink in, and getting some details from a sentry, war wasn't looking so exciting. The rest of the team seemed to be very excited, even unable to wait, for the battle to start. That morning, Sniper gave the ballbot an old SMG as a backup, assuring it was great for dealing with enemy spies.

The Administrator came on the speakers at exactly 11 'o clock, counting down for the daily battle to begin. ATLAS looked to his left and saw the Demoman gripping his grenade launcher confidently and strategizing with the Spy on the best way to capture the 'Intel'. Pyro interrupted ATLAS's observations with a tap on the shoulder and a muffled "follow me". The android nodded and as the gates opened, ten blue clad mercenaries rushed out, whooping excitedly. Pyro led ATLAS through a few halls, down some stairs, and into the room guarding the Intelligence. The pyromaniac and robot waved to Engineer as the started constructing a sentry gun and healer for extra protection.

ATLAS was feeling a bit better guarding with Pyro and Engie, not out in the thick of battle. Other than the Administrator constantly announcing every death and near capture and the quiet beeping of the sentry, the intelligence room was quiet.

"Fellas, be on guard. Spah sneakin' 'round here" the engineer warned as Pyro and ATLAs both stiffened up. An explosion was heard in the hallway, and Demoman ran into the room, burns and bullet wounds all over his body. Engineer rushed him over to the dispenser, which made quick work of the majority of the injuries.

"s-s-s-py i-in t-t-t-the base, mates, watch yer buildin's" the demolition expert warned again as Engie turned around to see his buildings deactivated, Mann co. Electro-sappers connected to both. "Aye, lad, you've got sappers on yer sentry!" Demo yelled as Engineer beat them off with his wrench.

As Engineer worked off the sappers, Demo stood up tall behind him and raised a hand with a spy's knife between the long fingers. Before Pyro or ATLAS could react, the arm plunged into Engineer's back, killing him. Demoman turned around as the spy's disguise fizzled off, leaving a slender man in a red suit and mask standing before the Pyro and ATLAS. Pyro charged the man, who quickly evaded the flames and stabbed Pyro in the back. ATLAS raised his portal gun, and shot a deep blue portal under the spy's feet, which sent the RED mercenary and a fallen BLU mercenary down, off the tallest tower, and onto the hard dirt below.

"Congratulations on your first kill, Portaleir." The administrator shouted through the speakers to the lone robot guarding the Intel. Demoman walked into the room, come to congratulate the robot, but instead was met with a gruesome scene. ATLAS jumped and whipped out the SMG, pointing it shakily at the unsuspecting demolitionist.

"Aye! What's all this? I'm no bloody spy!" Demo shouted partially in fear and partially in shock at the barrel aimed at his forehead. ATLAS lowered the gun, realizing the spy was, in fact, dead. The demoman looked over at the fallen engineer and smoking sentry gun, and removed his beanie briefly. "He'll be back, robot, probably with Pyro or somebody to do some spy checkin'." ATLAS stared at the body. Back? From the dead? From the information GLaDOS gave him, humans die once and stay dead. Fortunately, ATLAS didn't have to wait much longer before Engineer and Pyro came down the stairs and casually walked back to their posts. Demoman gestured to Engineer, and after a quick conversation, Demoman walked over to ATLAS. "Robot, yer comin' with me. We're gonna go git that briefcase." ALTAS hesitantly followed Demoman up the stairs and up to the battlements, wondering what the enemy base would hold.

**A/N: We've got a battle! Tell me if the accents were right, because I'm pretty bad at them on a normal day. Also, 2 updates in one day!? A New Story got a new chapter, so check that out too. Also, since I have the space, answer me this:**

**Should I stay within the confines of the CTF/Payload/KOTH/CP or go out into Mann vs. Machine in the later chapters? Put that in the reviews, along with a review. What should happen in the RED base? Put that down there too. I'm not afraid to take suggestions, guys. Just give 'em to me!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: 2 days in a row? I had some extra time on my hands, and I am spending it here! Anyway, Demo and ATLAS are storming the RED base to capture the Intelligence! The New Story will be updated tomorrow, most likely, so watch for that. Also, quick thing;**

**Shius: Yeah, you're probably right. I'll stick to Intel capture for now, but I do have plans for a small Payload chapter because it's my favorite mode. I'll be sure to explain it well.**

ATLAS and Demoman reached the battlements overlooking the small roofed bridge that separated the two bases. The plan Spy, Demo, and Engineer concocted was working flawlessly except for one problem. They were not expecting a RED Heavy and Medic combo to be patrolling the outside of the base. Looking at the pair, ATLAS was sure the Heavy would not fit through a portal, and the Medic's backpack seemed to make him too bulky, too.

Sniper was crouched down, listening to the RED Heavy's custom-tooled cartridges slamming into the wooden wall behind him at 10,000 rounds per minute.

"Need some help here!" Sniper yelled over the minigun shots to his teammates.

"With tha Heavy? We got 'em" Demo replied as he fired several stickybombs around the Medic and Heavy. Unfortunately, the Medic saw this and activated his Ubercharge, completely shielding both Heavy and Medic from the huge explosion. ATLAS thought back to testing, trying to think of any ways he accidentally killed his partner that would apply in the battle. He remembered the crusher incident… but there didn't appear to be any crushers nearby. Dropping the light bridge by accident? No light bridges. The bot racked his memory for a few more seconds, before coming up with a brilliant idea.

Shakily, ATLAS aimed his portal gun out of the opening in the wood and fired a portal under the Heavy, which he promptly fell into and got stuck. ATLAS hesitated for a moment, before deactivating both portals and hearing the Heavy being cleaved clear in half, leaving the Medic, whom quickly received a headshot, courtesy of the Sniper. ATLAS and Demoman jumped down and charged across the bridge, making their way into the Reliable Excavation and Demolition base.

"Careful, lad. Sentries bound to be by 'e Intel." The demolition expert warned ATLAS as they got closer to the enemy Intelligence room. The ballbot wondered briefly if P-Body was here too, somewhere, maybe guarding like he did.

The Administrator broke the silence, announcing "The enemy has taken our Intelligence!" Demoman seemed to shrug off the important announcement, and simply left a few stick bombs on floor, where the enemy was bound to run with the Intel. Suddenly, the BLU spy de-cloaked down the hallway a bit, gesturing to Demoman before pulling out a simple cigarette case and, to ATLAS's surprise, becoming the RED Pyro. The fake Pyro ran into the Intelligence room and started mumbling about something that the RED Engineer was shocked by. A quick backstab and sapped building later, and Spy called that it was safe to come in. Demo grabbed the Intel, and handed it over to ATLAS.

"Zere's bound to lots of fighting, so just get back to zhe base with zhat zhere briefcase." Spy instructed ATLAS as the sounds of the RED team dashing down the halls became louder.

"Actually…" the demolitionist smiled, and pressed a second trigger on the stickybomb launcher, "Maybe not…"

The entire RED team had been unfortunate enough to be near the eight stickybombs, and were all blown to pieces in an instant. The Administrator announced that the BLU Intelligencehad been dropped, and the RED Intelligence had been captured as the three fighters sprinted out of the RED base, both Intelligence briefcases in hand.

That night was a celebration. Never, in the 5 years the battles had been going on, had BLU beaten RED that badly, capturing the Intelligence in a record fifteen minutes. ATLAS didn't feel muck like celebrating, though. It had only been for a second, but the blue tester was sure that among the various human remains, he had seen a few sterile white and orange plates…

**A/N: Whelp… That's it. Sorry for the short chapter, I promise the next one will be longer. Also, the next update may not be within the next few days, so do your best to pull through until then. Also, this chapter might be cursed. My brand new headphones broke as I was writing this, and my other headphones wouldn't work either, which means Half Life 3 Confirmed, guys. I think I'm just going to put a question at the end of every chapter, and today's is: DO YOU LISTEN TO MUSIC WHILE WRITING? Leave that in the reviews, along with a review. In case anybody was wondering, I listen to the Portal 2 Songs to Test by Full Soundtrack. It is all of Portal 2's music, free! But I digress… Until next time, Adios**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: New chapter! I'm reeeeeaaaaly sorry this took so long, but I ran out of ideas for what was going to happen and I've probably re-written this chapter 3 times. One of which I kept and (might) post as a separate thing. Anyway, I have ONE DAY of school left and everything will be back to normal. If chapters stop updating, I died during a test or something. Reviewer Responses~**

**Oakheadlord: That's actually a really good idea. I think that will be P-Body's primary or something. Thanks for the review!**

**Epikrocket: Well, P-Body is in this chapter (alive and stuff). Also, I think P-Body is a she.**

_-RED base, Tuefort-_

"Men, we have suffered a loss today, the second in a row to those filthy BLU's." The RED soldier lectured his team, "Now, can anybody tell me why?" He questioned, glaring at Spy.

"Engineer," Soldier addressed the team's engineer, who was fiddling with his mechanical hand, "This robot needs a better weapon. Make one." The Engineer mumbled something under his breath, then gestured to P-Body and set off to his lab.

After spending most of the night dismantling, examining, and modifying the Portal Gun, it was complete. Replacing the black hole fragment were two tubes of experimental gels that enhanced speed or increased jump height. Following a considerable amount of work, the Zero-Point Energy Field had been extended in reach and strength. Unfortunately, the weapon could not be formally tested, as the teams were being moved to Foundry and the following day was reserved for traveling.

The Administrator came on the announcement system at 10 o' clock the next day, alerting the RED team that the train had arrived. Each team member boarded the train, finding a seat and getting comfortable for the 500 mile ride. The scene within the passenger car was not exceptionally interesting, as Medic and Heavy playing chess while Sniper polished his Kukri, Demoman sat around a table playing poker with the Engineer, Scout, and Soldier. Pyro lounged in a chair, staring out the window, and Spy was reading a book. P-Body had been disassembled and was in a crate in the corner.

A few hours later, the RED team had arrived in Foundry. Soldier gave another lecture to his team during dinner, then they all settled in for the following day's battle.

P-Body emerged from the reassembly machine, ready for battle. It may have been the new gun, but the android was eager to begin the day's battle. The Administrator spoke over the airwaves earlier that day, announcing the start of the battle at 9:00 am.

P-Body rushed out of the gate, following Soldier and Heavy on the offense. The different gels that her gun provided made moving the slower two men much easier, and it wasn't long until the increased jump height and speed caught the attention of BLU. Neither team was familiar with the area, since it was newly purchased by Mann Co., which slowed the pace of the battle for some time to allow a strategy for each team to develop. Nonetheless, fights were erupting near the center of the area, and P-Body took the opportunity to formally test the device.

With heavily upgraded motion tracking software uploaded, the egg shaped android quickly took in the area and placed gel splashes to upset the BLU's advances. The sight that followed was rather humorous, since the BLU Heavy was not accustomed to the increased speed that coated the ground and completely lost the ability to aim while he slid.

The BLU soldier, attempting to rocket jump over the orange gel, ran into blue gel and flew an incredible height. He did come back down, however, and promptly collided with the ground in a proper SPLAT.

The BLU scout was not prepared for increased speed either, and connected solidly with a wall at an incredible speed. The RED Demoman, who felt confident in his skills, unsheathed his massive ghost sword, the Eyelander, and charged down the streak of orange goop, which boosted his already boosted speed, and decapitated a BLU Medic who was obliviously walking around the corner.

In a short time, the once peaceful rustic area was turned into a gore-splattered battlefield. After quickly executing the BLU engineer's sentries and sending the BLU Pyro flying, the RED Scout nabbed the intelligence briefcase and went on his way back to secure it.

At least, he was on his way back when he tripped through a portal and found himself falling into a room with multiple other BLU sentry guns, and the Administrator announced the BLU Intelligence was dropped. ATLAS and the BLU Engineer high-fived as the sentry guns decimated the unfortunate scout.

The RED team was in a huge pickle. P-Body, however, held the solution to the team's problem. Fortunately, ATLAS didn't think to shut off or move his portal, as it created the perfect passage for fire from RED. P-Body sent a stream of blue gel down the portal, with support from the RED Medic's Kritzelkreg, allowing it to coat the floor. Of course, ATLAS was familiar with the gels from testing, and quickly shut off his portal.

He was too late.

The gel began to slowly spread across the floor. It wasn't long until the gel made its way to a sentry gun, which launched the turret across the room and into a wall. The gel continued spreading, knocking sentry guns out as it went, also taking the BLU engineer, before the only thing blue in the room was ATLAS and the gel.

_-ATLAS, Repulsion Gel Room-_

Things weren't looking up. ATLAS was perched on top of a broken sentry gun, surrounded by repulsion gel that glowed red, apparently crit-boosted from what Engie had said moments before being launched and buried halfway into the ceiling.

ATLAS could hear footsteps coming down the hall, and readied his SMG. The man who peered through the opening was none other than the BLU Sniper. ATLAS lowered his SMG and beeped for help. In one swift motion, the BLU Sniper raised his sniper rifle with one hand and fired, un-disguising to reveal the RED Spy in the process. ATLAS had no chance to fight back, as the bullet embedded itself in his optic, and the ballbot fell off the rubble he was perched on and into the repulsion gel, then into the ceiling. A few seconds later, he reappeared in the BLU spawn room, just in time to hear the Administrator.

"You FAILED" she announced as a boo-ing crowd sound played. Indeed, BLU had failed.

**A/N: Before anyone says anything, I KNOW that an Engineer cannot place a normal sentry gun with the gunslinger equipped, and that one Engineer cannot place more than one sentry in a game if CTF. I also don't care.**

**Anyway, I have a question for you guys who are reading and play TF2. Question: What is your favorite wrench to use when playing Engineer?**


	5. Chapter 5: NOT A CHAPTER

**A/N: Well hello dear reader, I am back! I have a kind of important update along with a deleted scene of sorts from chapter 4, so sit tight for a second and we can get this over with quickly. Honestly, I don't like to write this much bold text in one story, but I digress.**

**I have a few interesting ideas bouncing around, so I will be putting out random one-shots every now and then, but that does NOT mean I abandoned any stories or anything.**

**I haven't been updating recently, just in case you didn't notice, and I actually have a legitimate excuse. I recently opened a YouTube account, and I've been spending almost all my time making videos. Unfortunately, I just got braces, and I still cannot talk very clearly, so I am stopping making videos for a while, which means more updates for Fan !**

**This is not a chapter! When I was writing chapter 4, I had originally used ATLAS's POV in a silly scene with Heavy, Demoman, and Soldier. Since it was almost 500 words, I decided to keep it, and here it is!**

ATLAS was wandering the halls of the Tuefort living quarters, scanning and mapping the entire place in his memory banks. Although it was not particularly late, a few of the mercenaries, namely Medic and Scout had gone off to bed. After walking down most of the hallways, the ballbot came to a set of double doors and an illegible sign next to them. Curiously, the bot pushed open one of the doors, and saw a large training gym before him where Heavy, Soldier, and Demoman sat, lifting weights. Heavy was the first to notice ATLAS peering through the doors.

"Does lettle baby robot man need something?" The Russian's voice boomed as he set down his 600-pound barbell and stood off the bench.

ATLAS tried to wave his hands like he wasn't interested, but the Heavy Weapons Guy seemed to have other ideas.

"Da, come, you must get strong to punch other baby men!" he instructed as he pulled ATLAS over to the bench and adjusted the weights, "Dis here only 500 pounds. Should be no problem."

Soldier sat down his own weights (which weighed significantly less), and Demo put his bottle of scrumpy down and teetered over to the bench to watch ATLAS attempt to lift the massive load. ATLAS hesitated for a second before applying every bit of energy he had to the servos on his arm assemblies. Although it was obvious he was not build to lift 500 pounds, ATLAS managed to get the barbell off the stand….

Before it promptly fell and smashed his central core. All three men jumped back, as if the weight was falling on them. A few minutes later, ATALS walked back in the room, fresh from the assembly machine, and saw Heavy lifting the barbell off the android's previous body with one hand, while arguing with the soldier.

"You no-good communist numbskull!" he yelled while whipping out his Disciplinary Action. Heavy gave the Soldier one strong, threatening look that made Demoman turn around and drunkenly walk back to his beloved bottle of alcohol.

"Heavy not in mood to fight tiny baby man." He simply stated as the hulking Russian shoved the smashed robot off his bench and walked out past ATLAS.

"Lettle robot should go use baby soldier's weights, not strong enough for Heavy's" the Heavy commented as he walked past. Given the air between the two, ATLAS opted not to interact with soldier at the moment.

**A/N: Aaaaaaand that was as far as I got. Anyway, hope you liked this 'deleted scene' of sorts! I promise updates will start coming out again, so be watching for those if you follow any of my other stories.**

**Also, Bob-365: I have to agree, the Southern Hospitality is pretty good with the bleed damage. Personally, I use the Jag because I can't stand how loooong the Dispenser and Teleporters take to build.**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: I'm sorry this chapter took so long to get published, but I was running out of ideas until one of my friends was like "Hey bro what about you [SPOILERS]" and I was like "Sure great idea thanks man I'll try [SPOILERS]"**

Humans were an interesting sort, P-Body thought, as she observed the party most of the REDs were participating in. Spy, Pyro, Sniper, and herself, however, either refused to or could not physically get drunk. The other members, namely Medic, Soldier, Demoman, Scout, Heavy and Engineer, seemed to have no problem with wasting themselves after a victory over BLU.

"Men, our Scout is a lightweight!" Soldier exclaimed, pointing in Scout's general direction with his half-empty beer bottle. A few of the other men nodded drunkenly, with the exception of Heavy, who seemed unfazed by the large amount of alcohol he'd downed.

"Ey, thereain't no wayyou ca-can out-drink me, ya rocket-hoppin creep!" Scout slurred half in anger and half in through his own unhealthy ego. Spy shook his head silently and Sniper rolled his eyes, knowing well that Scout couldn't quite live up to his words. P-Body, not knowing the majority of what was happening, quietly watched all this, noting that the bottles of liquid seemed to impair judgement, that humans did not care, and that it was desirable in some way.

The team's Pyro seemed about as used to this as P-Body did, which was strange, as it seemed to be a grizzled veteran in battle. The eggbot nudged Sniper, who was the only reliable source of information around, except maybe Engineer in his undrunken state.

After claiming Sniper's attention, P-Body gestured at Pyro. "Yea, that's Pyro. Wot about him?" the sharpshooter questioned. The android pointed at the clock, then the door, then back at the asbestos-suited enigma. "Hm? Oh, when did 'e start here? Well, it wasn't too long ago, maybe a few months, I honestly couldn't tell ya. It hasn't been long though." P-body nodded, noting that too. "Well, Oi'm goin to bed, I'd suggest the same to you, Spook." Sniper called as he opened the back door to go off to his camper van, which he much preferred to the rooms in the base.

"Alas, ze bushman is correct. Good night, robot." Spy also bid as he walked off to his room. Noting the disappearance of the two support classes, Pyro glanced nonchalantly around the room. At first it was a simple sweeping motion most humans tended to make out of boredom, but its stare quickly fixed itself on the egg shaped tester. Flinching as in recognition, the Pyro motioned for P-body to follow it. Unsure of what the firebugwanted, P-body followed. Pyro led the bot down a hallway, then down another, and finally to what P-Body presumed to be his room.

Closing the door softly behind him, Pyro sat down on the bed and checked the window to assure the shades were down. P-Body, becoming unsure and slightly uncomfortable with the Pyro took a small step backwards. Pyro waved his hands and motioned for P-Body to come closer. P-Body hesitated, then stepped forward. The firebug took a breath, then wrapped a glove around its mask. P-Body stood, confused as ever, waited to see what the pyro was doing.

In a swift motion, Pyro whisked its mask off, revealing a woman, roughly in her mid-twenties with short, sweaty brown hair and steely grey-blue eyes. P-body, in short, was shocked. Before her stood the lady that GLaDOS had released, that had bested GLaDOS and defeated the machine. Everything that GLaDOS had said about the woman shot to the front of her mind. Murderous lunatic. Psychopath. Dangerous. The bot reeled back, throwing up its hands and turning its head.

"Hey now, what's with that?" The woman questioned in a soft, friendly tone. "What, did She tell you awful stuff about me or something? I'm not going to do anything to you. I just thought, you know, you might remember me, and we could be friends because, honestly, the rest of those guys are creeps." P-Body lowered her hands, remembering the times that GLaDOS had also lied and said bad things about Blue that weren't true. Maybe this lady wasn't so bad after all. Maybe.

**A/N: Haha! Betcha didn't see that one coming! Chell is the RED Pyro, and I'm sticking too it. Personally, that's my theory anyway. Also, Chell doesn't suffer from Pyrovision. Think about it, neither does the in-game Pyro, only when you equip certain weapons/cosmetics does that happen. Anyway, Sorry this took so long to get out, and I hope it was worth it! See yall next time!**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Hey, remember this story? Yeah, neither did I until I was going through my stats and found that this was by far my most popular story (but What Friends Do is catching up really fast!) and I figured it was about time for an update. I do have a general outline for this, and unfortunately, somebody guessed the BLU Pyro's identity long before I could come up with a way to explain it without an identical chapter to the last one. So yes, Mel is the BLU Pyro. With Tough Break drawing to a close (RIP degreaser ;-; all hail the Phlogistonator) I figured it was high time to get a new chapter out! **

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

A sound came from outside the locked door, a slurry pair of footsteps along with an equally slurry set of words, some barley understandable and some, unfortunately, all to clear. None the less, they were Scouts, and the most meaningful bits were "Ey pyyyyyyro got I got a bee-eer for ya my man pyro, I love ya man…" The lady jumped and began trying to get the gas mask on, but the drunken Scout was furiously banging on the door, and was in no mood to go away. With her mask back on, Pyro opened the door and mumbled some gibberish that neither Scout nor P-body understood. Scout tried waving the unopened beer bottle around Pyro's mask, and jabbed her where her mouth most likely was.

Pyro reeled back in pain, and Scout stumbled forward to apologize. At this point, it was obvious who'd lost the drinking contest. While she was looking down and holding her mouth area, Scout sluggishly tried to remove the gas mask, which she was not happy about. "Comeonman, I… just wannagiveyou… a beer man coooomeonman!" Scout protested, and in his drunken rage, won the battle. The lady fell back, horrified, and tried to hide her face, but the hair was a dead giveaway. "OOOOooooohhh, hey there good lookin, what'd you doo with pyyyro. Actually, neverermind that guyyyy, wanna go grab some chicken?" Scout tried, noticing the long hair on her head. The lady, enraged, grabbed a shotgun laying near her bed and pinned Scout to the wall, pressing the barrel to his throat.

"Don't. You. Ever. Say. A. Word. About. This." She firmly commanded the runner. His eyes widened, his face paled, and an almost visible sobering came across him. P-body was a bit afraid, as this was more like how GLaDOS had described Her. There was no going back now, though, as her identity couldn't be wiped from the boy's mind.

-0-0-0-ATLAS's POV-0-0-0-

Another battle, this time located on a very new Mann Co. sect of land, simply called Pinewood, and we would be competing on a new Gamemode, Pass Time. Unfortunately, that meant nothing to poor Atlas, who was now out for the RED Spy, after being killed three times in a row by the masked man. Atlas stepped into the disassembly machine to be taken to the new area, and was reassembles minutes later, with all nine mercenaries in wait.

The objective was simple. Get the ball, throw it into the enemy's goal. Warfare was really weird, Atlas thought, as the sirens blared and the ten BLU fighters bounded out of the respawn room. Atlas hesitated when he found a giant, murky, puddle feet outside the door, remembering all the times that nearly identical looking water had killed both him and P-Body back in GLaDOS's test chambers, but these _weren't _GLaDOS's tests anymore. Atlas ran fearlessly through the puddle, and many more like it, on the way to the centre of the wooded, rustic area.

Atlas whipped out his SMG and attempted to spray down the enemy Scout, who was rushing past with the ball (the "Jack" as the administrator insisted calling it") but the Scout managed to escape with nearly a third of his health remaining. Seconds later, an assist notification appeared as Soldier fired a volley of rockets at the runner. BLUs Scout recovered the Jack and made a dash with Pyro for the goal. Atlas followed, feeling faster running near the scout, and noticed that the Pyro was running the same speed, too. The team made it halfway to the goal, but a trail of bright orange goo threw Scout and Pyro off their balance, Scout dropping the jack in the process. Atlas, well-versed in the art of Propulsion Gel, managed to catch the jack and fire a portal onto a nearby building, as well into the wall the gel trail led up to, and flew at a great speed into the air, hurling the jack into the RED's goal in the process.

An explosion erupted from the goal, which Atlas did not expect, and ended up being killed in the process, amidst the blaring horn and sounds of crowds cheering. By the time he respawned, RED has scored a goal, and the game was tied, one point all. As he left respawn, Atlas noticed he was at the top of the scoreboard for his team, while the RED Demoman was topping his own team. Calmly, Atlas stepped out of the wooden room, and instantly registered a sharp, damaging thrust into the back of his core. An incredibly loud fanfare and the Administrator's praise to the RED Spywas the last thing that registered before he died once again.

Once he respawned, Atlas made his way to the Resupply locker and dug through his items. Another notification had appeared, this time indicating a brand new weapon. Atlas drug out the weapon, a plated shotgun with a black barrel and stock, white pump and body, as well the Aperture logo. The stats gave it a +15% spread accuracy with the trade-off bring -15% magazine size, or, to be simple, 5 shots instead of 6. Exchanging his old SMG for the Portal Gun, and taking up the new shotgun as his primary, the ballbot set out. Atlas fired a portal through the respawn gate and onto a rock face with ground below, and a second portal just outside the door, to avoid another attack from Spy. He leaped out and through the portal, before closing both and switching back to the shotgun.

Loud horns erupted from the other side of the area, announcing BLU's score, credit to Scout. Just one point away from victory! Atlas heard a loud shot, almost as from a Sniper, echo down from above, and went up to investigate. Lo and behold, the RED Sniper lay crouched in the corner of the room, his Bazaar Bargain pointed out on the BLUs below. Atlas crept up until he was right behind the unsuspecting Sniper, and struck a fancy pose, before gesturing in a way similar to the Pyro's Scorch Shot tauntkill, except with the shotgun in hand. Blasting the Sniper clean in the head, Atlas achieved his firct certified tauntkill. He loaded another shell into the shotgun before pumping it again, and continued on his journey.

Atlas realized how differently he was solving problems now, almost as if it were still a test, but a harder, more dynamic one. Almost as if, all the seemingly bogus tests back in Aperture were actually translating to the real world.

Back in Aperture, GLaDOS chuckled. Both Orange and Blue had finally gotten past the benchmark. There was one problem, getting those two back would be a challenge, as She was there, along with another test subject GLaDOS had rejected, but never knew.

**A/N: Well, another chapter after a forever on hiatus! This just doesn't fell the same to write anymore, and I'll probably be wrapping it up in the future, but for now, a new chapter!**


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